Strife

We’d had illnesses at home. The temperature dropped suddenly again. My tires needed air. I’d put off filling my tank with gas, and then it was rainy and cold. A text came in. A family member had a medical emergency.

“Why this?” or “Why now?” have frequented my thoughts. “When do I get a break?”

Through the course of my life, I have become ingrained with the belief that a life can be lived without obstacles. When things are going really well, I seem to immediately beg for more. I forget which of my needs are being met and exclusively focus on the yearn for the more.

I get sick. My loved ones get sick. My friends or those I admire pass away. Time moves on. My body ages. I make mistakes. I fall short. I forget. I regret.

Failure, disappointment, and loss are not tangents of life. They are life.

There are mental games, philosophical mantras, and other coping techniques. However, if I set an expectation that I can live a life without any friction, then I will only be increasingly frustrated when I inevitably encounter it.

When I insist there is an existence without the negative aspects, I become hopelessly lost in sadness, yet bitterly close to true contentment. Contentment doesn’t come from the absence of hardship. It comes from accepting reality as it is. Whatever it is. Contentment is making room for the easy and the difficult.

Can I accept that friction is a sign that I am moving through life? While there may be room for improvement, will I allow for what I have to be enough? Can I find overall peace regardless of the individual pieces?

Be curious, be kind, be whole, do good things.